Celebrate a quarter century of stupidity! THE 365 STUPIDEST THINGS EVER SAID is the perennially bestselling calendar for 25 years, with over 4.8 million copies sold. Here is a riotous round-up of politicians, entertainers, athletes, and others saying epically dumb things, collected by Ross and Kathryn Petras. Every day, a new quote to make you laugh out loud and/or facepalm. Not-quite-there expressions: I’m the oldest I’ve ever been, right now.—MMA fighter and UFC Champion Tim Sylvia. Puzzling headlines: MAN PUNCHES HIMSELF, CHARGED WITH ASSAULT —headline, Gallup Independent (New Mexico). Neighborhood watch cluelessness: I want to report either a fox or a werewolf standing on the corner. —actual call to 911
Calendar meets font of wisdom. From the expert quote curators Ross and Kathryn Petras—whose books and calendars have sold over 10 million copies—it’s the wise and witty flip side to the bestselling 365 Stupidest Things Ever Said. Here are hundreds of insightful, enlightening, and whip-smart quotes from scientists, writers, philosophers, activists, comedians, and thinkers from all walks of life:
On wonder: Where there is great love there are always miracles.
On education: The beautiful thing about learning is nobody can take it away from you.
And on patience: Instant gratification takes too long.
Professional sports: It’s not all record-breaking feats or heartwarming teamwork. From regrettable plays to absurd antics (on and off the field), from imaginative cheaters to not-so-sage game analysis, no sport is safe in this hilarious year of athletic blunders. There’s uninspiring coach pep talks: It’s a no-win, no-lose situation.—Pittsburgh Steelers coach, Bill Cowher. Bizarre competitions: Did you know that solo synchronized swimming was an Olympic event for three consecutive Summer Games? And more buffoonery, adapted from the book by Ross and Kathryn Petras.